Sometimes Good Things Fall Apart So Better Things Can Fall Together.
The days of thinking about the dreaded D-word as a personal failure are long gone.
As most of us know by now, 42% of UK marriages end in divorce, but divorce rates aren’t nearly as high as people think they are among thirty-somethings. The average is dragged down by people who marry very early.
If you wait until you’re 35 to get married then there’s only about a 5% chance that you’ll get divorced, provided your partner is the same age.
When people find themselves single in their 40’s, it is often their own self-doubt that is holding them back from finding true love.
Upgrade your outlook to make better life choices.
This needn’t be expensive or time-consuming; it’s more about the little things you can do every day.
Be the best version of yourself. It’s amazing how much a shower and a shave can improve a man’s state of mind. And don’t just throw on any old thing; think about your outfit as a whole – leave those joggers at home! When you look your best self, you will feel your best self.
Think positive. And we don’t mean any hippy-dippy stuff (although if meditation is your thing, more power to you!). Replace negative thoughts with positive ones by focusing on solutions instead of problems. Talk positively and put energy into your actions. This will lead you to act positively too, and when you do this you will develop self-confidence one action at a time.
Know your principles and live by them, this will solidify your integrity with everyone you come across. Make this into one of the cornerstones of your life, helping to define and shape who you are, it will give you peace of mind and allow you to sleep better at night because knowing what you will and will not tolerate from yourself and others will help you make positive life choices that work for you.
Get active and stand tall. This could be exercise or even just getting out and about doing the things you love. Be active in your mind and body, and always hold your head high.
Smile! Sounds like a no-brainer, right? Smiling is a simple and effective way to display warmth, but it also influences your brain. A UCLA study found that smiling creates a mirror effect on neurons in the brain, and tells us that it’s also contagious. You know those people with a seemingly magnetic force that attracts all types of people? Whether they’re engaging you in a light and friendly chat or a meaningful conversation, being friendly and approachable in your daily interactions will make you feel good too.
Life really does begin at 40, up until then you are just doing research.
We know it’s easy to lose the motivation necessary for dating. At 30+ years people are busy with careers, kids and friends and family.
But this is the perfect time to find a new partner. You know yourself better, so you know what you don’t want. You know the consequences of not addressing what you need, so hopefully, this will enable you to approach the big issues head-on with a new partner. This way you waste less of your valuable time with someone who isn’t right for you.
Knowing what you want is an extremely attractive trait, it is what gives the older woman an edge over their younger counterparts; they approach life with a graceful calm that comes only from life experience.
Some people believe luck, winners believe in cause and effect.
It can be daunting approaching the online dating scene for the first time, where you’re expected to pick profiles from a couple of dodgy photos and a short blurb. There are sites out there for just about everything, but if you are looking for a serious long-term relationship there are some things you can do to limit the time you spend online.
Don’t join too many sites, and make sure the sites you choose take security seriously. Free apps may sound like a good idea, but soon become a minefield when you realise anyone can join and they may not be as honest as you.
Remember, the whole point is to get offline and on a date. Attraction is an intangible concept and the best way to tell if you’re attracted to someone is by hearing them speak and seeing how they move. So don’t carry on an endless chat with someone you’ve never met, set up a date or move on, you’re not looking for a pen pal!
After a divorce, you will emerge happier, a more independent and confident person. You won’t need just anyone but want only what is good for you.
And finally, remember to give people a decent chance. If you’re not sure, go on that second date and get to know the person on a deeper level. You never know…they may surprise you!
© Mai Tai Group 2018